Has anyone ever accused you of something that threatened your character? Maybe through maliciousness or misunderstanding? Perhaps correctly pointing out something wrong? Either way, knowing people thought something terrible of you puts you into a tailspin. Merriam-Webster defines reputation as:
1a: overall quality or character as seen or judged by people in general; 1b: recognition by other people of some characteristic or ability; 2: a place in public esteem or regard: a good name (n.d.).
Integrity. Wisdom. Compassion. Most people want to be known for some positive or admirable character qualities. Even the shysters of life want good aspects attached to their reputation so they can continue scamming others.
Several times throughout my life, I’ve been accused of being a snob. In high school, it was because I was afraid of everyone. People made up stories and said I thought I was better than them. They had it backward. I felt unworthy and fearful of everyone. At another time, in my thirties, my daughter was in dance classes and did competition-level dance. I found out that many of the other moms thought I was a snob because I kept to myself and did not participate in the frequent studio lobby gossip sessions.
King David was known as the man after God’s own heart. His reputation as a humble follower of God was as well-known as his fighting prowess. He committed adultery. And he then murdered the woman’s husband to try to hide his sin (Holy Bible, NIV, 2020, 2 Samuel 12). What a blow to his reputation!
Solomon followed David to the throne. He asked for and received wisdom from God (Holy Bible, NIV, 2020, 1 Kings 3). He allowed desire to overrule his wisdom. The many women he married led him astray (Holy Bible, NIV, 2020, 1 Kings 11), and he built altars to foreign gods. The wisest man to walk the earth allowed sin to ruin his life, declaring, “I have seen all things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, a chasing after the wind” (Holy Bible, NIV, 2020, Ecclesiastes 1:14).
My accusations of snobbery don’t seem so bad, considering David and Solomon. But sin is sin, great or small. All these accusations were painful. And like David and Solomon, I learned from them.
It hurt more when I was a teen. In high school, I didn’t know God. Salvation came about in my early twenties, and when I hit my thirties, I had moved from Scriptural milk to baby food. I knew what they said about me was untrue, so I didn’t ponder it excessively.
Here’s the secret to regaining your lost reputation, though. Repent. You won’t get out of the consequences of the situation, but you can recognize your sin before God. And once that happens, everything else will fall in line.
David repented. He lost the child he helped create, but he did make things right between himself and God and between himself and Bathsheba. Solomon also realized his sin. Returning to Ecclesiastes (12:13-14), he said, “Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the duty of all mankind. For God will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil” (Holy Bible, NIV, 2020).
Eventually, I realized I did have a sin. Pride. While I will never be the outgoing, life-of-the-party personality, I was also holding back from those other moms because I felt superior. I was a Christian; I wouldn’t stoop to gossiping. When Jesus finally got through to me, I repented. No wonder they had been calling me a snob. I was. I asked God’s forgiveness and then found ways to start interacting. Through fundraisers, carpools, and similar things, I became friendlier. I still avoided the gossip sessions, but by talking and helping, I lost the bad reputation I had earned unintentionally.
Today, I realize that popular opinion doesn’t mean much to me, but I value my reputation. I want a reputation of integrity. Of compassion. Honesty and lovingkindness. Wisdom. Jesus Christ in me allows compassion, wisdom, integrity, and honesty to flourish within my life. I’m always seeking to grow and know Him more. And thereby extend the Gospel further by people seeing him at work in my life. A tarnished reputation could hold someone back from accepting Christ as their Savior. If they see or hear of me doing something at odds with the Christian lifestyle, they may think ‘that person doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Look at her; she’s saying all this Bible stuff, yet she goes out and does whatever.’
Rebecca A Killeen, Author 